TRANSCRIPT
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The Rabbi Daniel Lapin Podcast
Episode: My 2024 Election Predictions & Fatal Flaw in Dating Apps
Date: 06/30/23 Length: 58:52
Daniel Lapin 0:00
Welcome, happy warriors. Welcome to the rabbi Daniel Lapin show where I, your rabbi, remind you that the more that things change, the more we need to depend on those things that never change. And that's what we tend to talk about on the show, exploring the things that never change, and how they can effectively anchor you to reality. While you are exploring exciting alternatives and adventurous options, yes, you are happy warriors. And to remind you, that phrase, the happy warrior is not one that I invented. I took it from a poem by the English poet William Wordsworth. And here are a few lines from the poem:
Daniel Lapin 1:06
Who is the happy warrior? Who is he, that every man in arms should wish to be? It is the generous spirit, who, when brought, finds comfort in himself and in his cause. And while the mortal mist is gathering, draws his breath in confidence of Heaven's applause. This is the happy warrior. This is he that every man in arms should wish to be.
Daniel Lapin 1:41
Another poet was William Ernest Henley. And he wrote a great poem called Invictus. And the ending of Invictus is like this, "I am the master of my fate. I am the captain of my soul." And that's because you and I, we happy warriors are not tennis balls floating down the gutter of life. We are the captains of our souls. We are the masters of our fate. And so it is indeed my honor to be your rabbi. Yeah, we're all happy warriors, men, women. Because to live productively, you have to fight every day against the force of entropy if nothing else, you fight to maintain your possessions you fight to build and maintain your family and your money, your body and your business profession or career. Look, God created a world in which chaos and disorder rule. We find that in the second verse of Genesis chapter one. In the ancient Hebrew it's written, it's called Tau who bow who chaos and confusion. Life is a fight. And that is a good thing. Because to stop fighting, to stop seeking and striving, well, that's to die. And that's one of the reasons I'm opposed to retiring. And I call you not just warriors, but happy warriors. Because to throw yourself into the fight for eight or 10 hours a day, six days a week. Well, that's one thing. But to do all that with a debonair smile on your face and a jaunty pace to your stride, to do all that while generating an irrepressible surge, your happiness welling up in your soul. Well, that means you are spiritually grounded in everything that is life-affirming. You are devoted to your families and your finances, your faith, your fitness, and your friendships, knowing that you can triumph over those who both intentionally and unknowingly promote a dark abyss of satanic secular socialism, along with all the many destructive and evil, social pathologies that it generates.
Daniel Lapin 4:19
Well, I really ought to wait until March 2024. Before I tell you my current prediction for the November 2024 presidential election, because back in March 2016 November 2016, was when Donald Trump beat Hillary Clinton to become President of the United States of America in March 2016, I told you on this show, expressly articulately clearly unquestioningly unambiguously, I told you how to play out, I did tell you that Donald Trump would win in November 2016. And since then, in other podcasts, I've explained why I said that and how I knew. So it's a little bit early now. Okay, I'm recording this in the summer 2023. And so it's a little bit early. But nonetheless, I do have a prediction for November 2024's American presidential election. Now, when another few months go by and we find ourselves in spring 2024, I might have some modifications or changes possible. But for now, I do definitely have for you a prediction of what the landscape will look like, going into the elections early November 2024.
Daniel Lapin 6:04
Uh, first of all, let me invite, you know, it's not the invitation, let me not dissemble here, let me not mislead you. It's not so much an invitation as it is a request, I'd like to ask you to please make sure you subscribe to the show, that helps me doesn't cost you anything. And that way, I'm sure this is something you all understand. But the various platforms, whether it's YouTube, or Spotify, or Libsyn, or wherever, or wherever you listen. They all rate things based on the number of subscribers. And so making sure that you subscribe, just see, it's as easy as tapping the right button. That is something which helps me and as I say, doesn't hurt you at all, it might even help you if you're interested in getting notifications, that's something you can do. But at any rate, I asked you to do that. And I also would ask you that, if you want to benefit from being part of a community of happy warriors, if you would like to be part of a large group of people who organize their lives, and who structure their priorities on the basis of being a happy warrior, on the basis of building their finances, and their families, their fortunes their friendships and their faith and their fitness, then you might benefit from being in the company of like-minded people. Look, I'm not saying this is always easy, it isn't.
Daniel Lapin 7:59
Building a family is hard work, whether you are at the very early stages of trying to get married, or where and we'll talk about that a little bit further. In today's show, we'll discuss dating apps. But it's also a difficult thing at a later stage. Maybe, maybe you have just started raising children or maybe your children are already teenagers. Look, building a family is hard work. There's no question about it. Building your finances is hard work. There's no question about that. For most people, it doesn't come easy. It does require persistence. And it requires constant optimism. These are not always easy things to generate. And so having other people that you can reach out to who may be a little further down the path and then you are that's helpful, reaching out to other new happy warriors that maybe you can give a handle on just with some encouragement or some advice or some ideas or some guidance. All of that is very valuable. So you just have to go to the website. It's called wehappywarriors.com wehappywarriors.com. You know how to spell warriors, right? w a r r i o r s, we happy warriors.com And join us become part of our happy group. So that's that's valuable and worth being aware of.
Daniel Lapin 9:36
And an on to our elections now if we can do that. Okay. So, obviously, the conventional wisdom at at this particular point is that the election will be between Joe Biden the incumbent Democratic president and Donald Trump coming back for another attempt. And here is my prediction. My prediction is that it will not be an election between Joe Biden and Donald Trump. I don't think either of those two people will be on the ballot representing the Democratic and Republican Party respectively. What is with Joe Biden? Well, I think all that is going to happen there, as the Democratic Party has already realized that he is a terribly weak candidate, the growing awareness of the incredible corruption regarding monies coming in mostly from Ukraine and other places to the family, many other problems, and I think has already persuaded Democratic leadership that they have to replace him. Kamala Harris is going to be sent packing back to California and nobody, nobody likes her in Washington, DC. So I really do think that the Biden's and Kamala Harris are history. Who is going to replace Joe Biden? Well, that's not really part of today's prediction. Today's prediction is mainly that the Democratic nominee will not be Joe Biden. The next part of today's prediction is that the Republican nominee will not be Donald Trump. Really? strongest candidate? No, no, that's, that's not so. Look. There is a lot of gratitude in the country, towards the things he accomplished. It was very refreshing to have a president who actually did many of the things he said he would do, he actually committed to appointing judges to the United States Supreme Court that were solidly originalist on the Constitution. And he did and the result is that Roe v. Wade was overturned. Now, a lot of people think that these are political decisions that the judges sit around and decide what would be good for America? No, it's a legal decision. They are evaluating the law of Roe v. Wade, the abortion law, in terms of the Constitution and in terms of jurisprudence, and they concluded that it was a very, very bad law back in the 1970s. The, they also turned down the idea of universities, accepting students on the basis of race. This was a lawsuit brought, I believe, by an Asian student, who realized that black and Hispanic students with far lower grades were being admitted, while he was not given a place in the university. And so they ruled correctly on that. Although I'm not sure that it'll make a huge difference, because the universities already announced publicly shamelessly how they're going to circumvent the Supreme Court ruling. The Supreme Court also ruled that a website designer who was conservative and did not want to create websites for same-sex couples, that she's within her rights to do that. And that was also a ruling. All of these things came about only because Donald Trump was the president of the USA for four years, and nominated two justices. That is an appointed 2 justices. That's the only reason these things have happened. So there is a lot of gratitude towards Donald Trump.
Daniel Lapin 14:02
But at the same time, with all his strengths come some terrible weaknesses. And I do believe that voters as much as they like him, and as much as they appreciate what he did, I think that when it comes to the early primaries in Iowa, New Hampshire, South Carolina and other places, I think that they are not going to go for Donald Trump. And I think that Wisconsin is not going to go for Donald Trump. So and many other places, but I'm talking about basically early primaries. And so I think the campaign the Trump campaign will grind to a halt. So who will the Republican nominee be? That is not part of today's prediction. And I'll tell you that a little bit further down the road. But I mean, obviously, the logical person to step in there is Ron DeSantis. On the Republican side, and the logical person on the Democratic side is Gavin Newsom, governor of California who has been running for the presidency for years already. So, we shall see. But the prediction is no Donald Trump on the GOP side, and No, Joe Biden on the Democratic side. So I think the whole thing is going to be far more interesting than people have been supposing people thought it's going to be a Biden-Trump race. Conservatives have hoped that in such a contest, Donald Trump wins. Left-wingers and progressives have been confident that any this is really how they think and how they put it, by the way, anybody would beat Trump in 2024. If Trump was the Republican nominee, even Joe Biden would beat Donald Trump. But if it starts becoming apparent that Donald Trump may not be the nominee, you will see the Democratic Party scrambling to replace Joe Biden. And Kamala Harris. So those are the political predictions that we have for you today. And we'll leave that on the table for us to be able to watch what happens in the months ahead.
Daniel Lapin 16:44
But with that out of the way, let us take a look at what I said I would want to chat about with you today. And that is the singular flaws of dating apps. In other words, large percentages of couples these days, claimed to have met through a dating app, and there any number of them ranging, you know, from eHarmony, which suggests that it is very marriage-oriented, all all the way to those that are far from being marriage-oriented, being much more, if you'll pardon me hook-up-oriented. And I want to take a look at those together with you if we can. I'm not I'm not talking about writing them, I'm not going to go through the different dating apps. But I do want to say what is fundamentally wrong with each with the dating app world in general, and how it can be circumvented. If you are hoping to meet somebody via a dating app. I have some ideas on how you can maximize the likelihood of that happening. Okay, that's what we're gonna do. Okay, so we're looking into the question of the dating apps. And here is the first point I want to make clear, I don't doubt that there are occasional exceptions to the rule I'm about to articulate. But the number of exceptions is tiny. If I had to guess I'd say 1%, maybe 2% of women, and a slightly larger percentage of men, to whom what I'm about to say does not apply. But to the overwhelming majority of us. What I'm about to say does apply.
Daniel Lapin 18:49
I listened to a doctor a couple of years ago was telling me that all his patients think that they're unique, and he gives them advice. And he says, here's what you should be doing. These are the things you should do. These are things you shouldn't do to maximize your health. And he says almost everybody says to themselves, that may be true for most people, but I'm exempt from that it does. It doesn't apply to me. And, said the doctor to me said, one of my hardest challenges is to help particularly men learn to accept the ways in which they are actually very much like other men. Yes, of course, every single human being is unique, no question about that everyone made in the image of his Creator, and the unique creator of that. But nonetheless, if there is a pattern, in that a certain type of diet or a certain lack of exercise produces a certain result. The odds are that it will apply to you too. And so I say the same thing here, too. And the overwhelming majority of women, and I'm not going to say, you know, with the exception of those who don't agree, because it's so overwhelmingly true. And I'm speaking now mostly about single women, the overwhelming majority of other women want to find a husband, who will love them forever, raise a family with them in love and harmony and, and goodness, and grow old together with that. It's as simple as that. Yes, I know, we live in this brave new world that Huxley didn't even dream of. And, yes, we've endured 60 years of feminism and gender egalitarianism, fine. The important thing is not what's changed, the important thing is how little has changed.
Daniel Lapin 20:52
And, you know, the fact is women put up with a lot, women settle for a lot less than what I've been talking about, they really want. And part of the reason for that is that they don't believe that it's attainable. And so they settle for some level of human connection, even if it is a far cry from what their souls actually yearn for. And so that, that is the reality majority of women are really looking for lasting love, a husband forever, somebody with whom they can raise children, somebody who will be a true partner, and somebody to be with for the rest of their lives. That's what most women really do want very clearly. Most women obviously find it quite difficult to achieve that. And to attain that to reach that goal. And what happens is, first of all, women are petrified of actually telling a guy that that's what they're looking for, because they believe that that will send him running for the hills faster than his feet can carry him. And so fear of driving him away, and being left alone, early on in the relationship allows them to really mislead the guy in terms of never letting him know how urgently and desperately they really do crave an ultimate union, a marriage something real. And so they suffer horribly because of that. And how should they go about doing this? Well, the fact is that you have to accept that many of the men you are likely to meet on dating apps, I will indeed be terrified by a clear enunciation of that desire and that commitment, because it's not what they're looking for. And indeed, they are immature men, there are immature men of 40 years old. By the way, it's not any longer necessarily an age-related thing. But there are men around for whom that will be terrifying, and you are better off not wasting your time with those guys in the first place.
Daniel Lapin 23:35
The second thing is that you've got to get and I'm speaking now to single young women, you've got to get used to the idea that men and women are different. Now I know that's very difficult, because you have been so successfully indoctrinated through your entire life, that men and women are the same. So partially as a result of that one of the things you do is you depict yourself in the same terms that you would like to see in a man to whom you are attracted. And so you might well find yourself automatically just as a result of your background and trading unless you were raised by wonderful parents who helped keep you on the right track. But if you were raised by a GIC, a government indoctrination camp, you used to call them public schools and, in heaven help you, a university, then the odds are that you depict yourself as a successful career woman because that's what you'd like to see in a guy. So your presumption is that since men and women are the same, that's exactly what guys would like to see in you. And nobody has helped you understand that a real man could care less about your career and about your earning power, and about your successful job, couldn't care less, not in the least bit interested in it. What he is interested in is how masculine you make him feel. And one of the ways that you really, really eliminate masculinity need on the part of a man is radiating independence, a sense of not needing a man. And so yes, if you subscribe to that old witticism of a man, a woman needs a man like a fish needs a bicycle, well, that does very little for a man, because it indicates that you don't need him. And men love feeling needed by a woman. That is a really big, big thing. Part of the unfortunate problem is that feeling unneeded and feeling redundant, is only one step away from feeling impotent, which is absolutely the worst feeling for a man. And so this is one of the very common mistakes made by women, radiating a sense of independence, assuming that just as they find that attractive in a man, that a man finds that attractive in a woman, and such is simply not the case at all. I'll go a little further than that, even and clarify that. One of the things that brings great pleasure and satisfaction to a man is making his woman happy. And, that is in every realm of life, in every realm of life, making his wife or woman or girlfriend, whoever it is, at the moment, making her life making her joyful, making her happy, ultimately, bringing her ecstasy, this is of crucial importance to a man. And the wise woman who is interested in becoming unified with a husband for life, makes clear that she allows him to make her happy, she allows him to bring her joy. She not only allows it, but she lets him know that he's done that, that is successfully made her a happy person. You know, the old saying, and I've done a whole show on this a while back, we did a podcast on Happy wife happy life. But, you know, there are elements of truth to that, but particularly when a woman not only radiates happiness, and again, remember, something I've discussed in the past, happiness is a decision you make, it's not dependent on prevailing conditions or the environment or climate. Happiness is a decision you make. So when you make a decision, to be happy, you are making yourself enormously attractive to a good man. And if you are then furthermore, able to reflect that happiness and indicate that that is because of him. That's a wonderful thing. You are on the way to a very beautiful union.
Daniel Lapin 28:40
And also, from the point of view of a man now, what are the majority of men looking for? Well, with women, I said, I was speaking about 98 or 99% of women. With men, I would say the same, as long as you allow me the definition to distinguish between men and boys. All right, so what I'm now about to say is not true for boys. But then ladies, you shouldn't have the slightest interest in spending any time with boys, unless you are their mother. If you're the mother of boys, that's wonderful. But if you are at a stage of life, where you are looking to be the wife of a great husband, then you're only looking for a man you're not looking for a boy. And time spent with boys is not only depressing, but it's an utter and complete waste of time. And so, if we confine ourselves to discussion of men, then it's safe to say that the comfortable majority of men also are seeking a woman to marry them for life. A woman with complete unshakeable loyalty, a woman with whom to raise a family and grow old. That's what the majority of men are looking for. Now, they are fearful. And men have been intimidated and terrified by what they see happening around what they've seen happening to many of their friends who married and things went very badly. So you have to know that, the that as a woman, you have to overcome a certain amount of apprehensiveness and fear on the part of a man, a certain sense that you can't possibly be as good as you seem, disappointment, and even betrayal just wait, down the road. And the same thing is true, of course, for women as well who and men have to understand this to women in the collective over the last 40 years of American history. And what I'm saying is true for many Western countries, women have been so badly treated, and that the if the woman you are dating sir, if the woman you are considering the woman, You are courting, if, if she is over a certain age, and she has had boyfriends before, you can rest assured that she has been maltreated, she's been treated very badly. So in many ways, there is an early stage in getting to know one another, where you have to each one has to sort of overcome the preconceived notions, the prejudices, if you like, but based in reality, that there are a lot of damaging and hurtful boys out there. And there are also women who have become toxic in many ways. I don't want to go into all the details here and now. But when I say that a man derives enormous joy, a sense of being a man being a masculine, a sense of happiness out of bringing happiness to his wife, this is true. And I hope you're recognize this to be absolutely true, even even if you haven't witnessed it that in your heart, you say, Yeah, you know what, that that actually fits with what I've seen of life. But there's a very good reason for that.
Daniel Lapin 32:37
And I don't want you to think that I came up with this idea I didn't, all I am good at is ancient Jewish wisdom, which I know well. And ancient Jewish wisdom is derived from the wisdom that is embedded within the Hebrew text of Scripture. And I'll just give you one example, in Genesis, excuse me, in Deuteronomy, chapter 24, verse five, if this is something that interests you, by the way, if you're interested in in considering the possibility that the Bible is not just a collection of chapters and stories and anecdotes and histories of long-forgotten people, but if you are open to the idea of possibly just possibly, it just might actually be a comprehensive theory on the totality of human existence, then you might like to actually see where certain things that I know and teach actually come from. And by the way, if you do not have a really good Bible, then go to my website and Rabbi Daniel lapin.com. And go to the store, and then look for books. And then you're looking for Rabbi Daniel Lapin's recommended Bible. Yeah, there's one Bible I recommend. And all the reasons I recommended you'll see there on the website. And, and so when I refer you to a verse, you can actually go along and take a look at it. But anyway, however you look at it. There's a verse in Deuteronomy, chapter 24, verse five, which basically says, I'm just going to tell you the I'm going to tell you the meaning of the Hebrew, even though the King James translation is very pretty, I mean, always like the King James translation. But it's not absolutely accurate. I'll tell you what the King James says, When a man had taken a new wife, he shall not go to war, neither shall he be charged with any business, but he shall be free at home one year, and he shall cheer up his wife which he has taken.
Daniel Lapin 34:59
Okay, so in the Hebrew becomes a little bit more colorful, and, and deep. And that is the first principle is that your wife is always your new wife. And if you think about marriages that have become a little worn a little frayed around the edges, where they are not even sure do they really love each other anymore. Look, when they got married, along with 100% of all the other couples, they told each other, they loved each other. So they obviously did. What's happened, what's happened is that they've allowed the marriage to deteriorate to a point where she's no longer his new wife. She's his old wife, he's taking her for granted, time has gone by, and routine has set in life has placed its demands. And he's not in any way treating her or thinking of her, or seeing her the way he did during their first year of marriage. And so there's a great deal of material that I teach, I teach it to coaching clients, I teach it to speeches at speeches, when I'm speaking on this topic, there's a lot of material on how a man should maintain his marriage in such a way. So is that his wife is always his new wife. And as you can imagine, a woman's response to that is very real. So it says, then he should be largely free from civic obligations and, and social obligations, because he should be focused on making an the King James says cheer up his wife, the better translation is bringing joy to his wife. And that's it, no way does it speak about it in the reverse.
Daniel Lapin 36:29
Oh, you know, women should bring joy to her husband. You know why? Because it happens automatically, if she allows him to bring her joy. If she reflects happiness at him, then he feels happy automatically. He has to initiate the action, namely, making her happy, she has to react wholeheartedly in feeling and being happy, and making sure that he knows what he has brought to her. And this is in, as I say, every aspect of married life. You know, working together, taking care of chores together, more intimately together in every aspect of the marriage. He derives joy when she reflects the joy that he brings her. And that's just one of the ways in which the system was designed. So when I said earlier that the key aspect of it is his desire to make his wife happy. This is something that ancient Jewish wisdom extracts and demonstrates from Deuteronomy, chapter 24, verse five, which described describes the reality it's not a regulation, it's not a rule. It's not a restriction. It's not a ritual. It describes a reality, which is that marriage works best when she is his new wife every single day of their marriage. And when he tries to make her happy, and she allows that process to take place, simple rules, but very unknown. But I can tell you, from many years of experience with working with countless couples, this what I've just told you is one of the most powerful rules for durable, harmonious, beautiful marriages, something that everybody wants deep down really once.
Daniel Lapin 38:13
Which finally brings us to the wonderful world of dating apps. First of all, how many dating apps or dating websites are there? You'll be shocked at the answer there are more than 1000. You know, people know the famous ones right? OkCupid and match.com and E harmony and of course Tinder but there are over 1000 of these things, which shows you you know, obviously how are incredibly important is it to us, each of us to find a mate. Now at this point, I must explain to you that one of the qualities of successful living is that we take into account certain realities. Let me give you an example. If somebody has a lactose intolerance, right, they arranged their diet so as not to eat a lot of dairy food. People have gluten issues. So they arrange their diet so as to eat gluten-free products. There are people who are uncomfortable flying, and they even are scared of flying. So they very often go to programs and courses to help them overcome that. I was talking to an Amazon delivery guy the other day. And I asked him about some contractions he had on his legs. And he said, Look, the part of town where I do most of my deliveries is that I'm always running up and down stairs, he said, You can't believe so I said, must be good for your fitness. He says, Yeah, it's great for my lungs. But it's rough on my knees. And so I have this kind of device on each leg, which reduces the stress on my knees. I didn't stop to examine exactly how it worked, although I am interested. But bottom line is he made adjustments for a if you like a bodily weakness, and that's a reality, you know, we are not titanium automatons. We are human beings. And we make allowances and adjustments for things that we are unable to do. If somebody has much less than 20/20 vision. So they don't drive maybe they don't drive at night without special glasses or maybe even in the daytime. But you know, people say okay, look, I don't see well enough to drive just as I am. I must put on corrective lenses.
Daniel Lapin 42:08
Okay, so, again, in many, many different areas, people wisely recognize their weaknesses and their shortcomings. And they take steps to alleviate it and make it possible to function with that shortcoming. Nonetheless, perhaps people who are trying to lose weight, and who have a weakness for certain types of foods? Well, they know, you know, stay away, maybe come to events after coffee and desserts are served, you know, people make allowances people recognize what their weaknesses are, and what their frailties are, and they make whatever corrections are necessary in order to be able to function you get the idea? Well, it's very important to note that our eyes are linked to our emotional part of the brain. And our ears are linked to the intellectual part of the brain. It's really important to know this. And I'll give you an example of how this works. Where do you think we find channels that sell stuff, you know, advertising channels, where it's one little Sutzkever after another that gets sold? Does that get sold on talk radio, or on television? And you know the answer, because purchases are usually emotional. And certainly impulse purchases, the purchases of things you don't really need. Those are emotional, and the AI plays a huge role in that. It's why the Sears catalog which used to be an absolute staple in every American home, I don't remember exactly when they vanished, but I certainly remember them. I am going to say into the 80s. But maybe even later than that. But you know, I loved the Sears catalog. It was just fascinating. But again, you know, it was heavy on pictures. And then you know, there were disruptions adequate information, but the picture was everything other than in technical purchases. So let's say you want to buy an aftermarket air intake for your car to improve the performance of your car engine. It sits under the hood, you don't really care what it looks like, is it made of carbon fiber is it made of metal? These are things you want to know. So there, there'll be heavy description because it's not going to be an emotional purchase based on how it looks. It might be an emotional purchase, based on the love for your vehicle that you want to improve
Daniel Lapin 45:01
But generally speaking, that is the case, if I were to ask you, have you ever encountered a man who made a really bad decision about a woman? I think virtually each and every happy warrior listening can say, Yes, I have met a man who I know made a really bad decision about a woman. My next question is, did he make that bad decision as a result of seeing her and his eyes? Or did he make a bad decision based on never having met her and seeing her but just having spoken to her on the phone? And I think you know the answer to that as well. Yes, our eyes are tied to our emotions. And that makes them well, a little less than 100% reliable. And so that is why again, we're you know, where do we know this from going back to those of you who are interested in in the biblical aspect of things, the biblical book of Numbers, chapter 15, verse 39, and with the King James translation says, And it shall be unto you for a fringe, that you may look upon it and remember all the commandments of the Lord, and that you seek not after your own heart in your own eyes, after which you used to go a warring a whoring - a dated translation, but then it is over 400 years old. in the original Lord's language in the original Hebrew, do not go after your heart in your eyes, which leads you astray. In all kinds of bad ways, why hearts and eyes was I just said hearts in Scripture, heart is always a metaphor for emotions, always. And so this is what it's really saying is Be alert to the fact that your heart, your eyes, and your emotions are going to be responsible for misleading you. And that's nearly always the case. Where when, when the anti-war movement in the 60s, gained full steam and was working very hard to get Americans to begin to take action against the government and to make it impossible for the United States government to continue prosecuting the war in Vietnam. One of the things they did is they changed the rules that had been in place for forever. And that is you didn't show dead bodies. You didn't show dead bodies in, in public media. I'm sure you remember the very famous Vietnam photograph, which, which had a profound impact. I don't know if you remember what I'm talking about. But this photograph, won the Pulitzer Prize in 1969. And it was a photograph of a South Vietnamese captain or general. I think his name was Nick Gouldian. Ngoc lOn. And I, I'm probably butchering the pronunciation. At any rate, what happened was they had captured the Gouldian van Lem and LEM had been accused of murdering South Vietnamese lieutenant colonel and his wife and six children and the officer's eight-year-old mother. And, so this Vietcong guy was summarily shot to death in the street and an NBC photographer, no, you know what, I think he was an Associated Press photographer, Eddie Adams, you know, lifted up his camera, and he just thought that the Vietcong guy was going to be threatened. But he actually got a picture of the bullet coming out of the head of the Vietcong guy at the instant he was murdered, or executed, whatever you want to call it. And, and that did more to bring about the anti-war, intense feelings in the United States. Then all the arguments and all the debates and all the discussions and all the politics, photo things that you see with your eyes are enormously influential, enormously powerful.
Daniel Lapin 49:45
And so what that verse in the book of Numbers is telling us is be aware that there may be things you do not want to see. There may be things that are not good for you to see because the impact They have on your mind, the impact they have on your brain, the impact they have on your emotions can be so powerful that you might well decide that you know what, that's not a good thing for me to see. And that is a wise step for anybody to take people to realize in the same way we realize all our other bodily weaknesses. So we should realize that the eyes are incredibly powerful in, in impacting our emotions, and decisions based only on emotions are usually not very good decisions at all. And that brings us to the fatal flaw of dating apps. The fatal flaw of dating apps, is they are all visually based they are all based on the eyes, not only Tinder, which is a very popular one, which basically, I mean, it's, it's very little more than the visual impact. And people swipe right to say, Yes, I'll meet that person or no. And of course, everybody already knows that. Women do not have to work very hard on a dating app to get to meet people. Guys are a lot harder. Obviously, all of that is self-evident. However, marriages, well, that's an entirely different story. meeting somebody for a short term, dalliance, easy to do, and if you're a woman can be done without any effort whatsoever. But you're talking now about a woman who wants to find a man to marry and to be united with for the rest of her life. A man wants to find a loving, loyal, happy woman to marry and to raise a family with for the rest of his life. That is a lot harder. Now, I'm not saying marriages don't result from dating apps they do, but not nearly in terms of the numbers of the people who are actually on these apps. And using these apps.
Daniel Lapin 52:15
The basic flaw is that it is very visual. And we are easily misled by our eyes and by our hearts. Better ways, better ways, is to meet somebody because of a common connector. Somebody who knows you and who knows the other person. And I always encourage single women and single guys hang out with married friends, at least as much as you do with single friends. Right hanging out with if you're a single woman looking to find a lifelong loving marriage, then hanging out with other single girls is against your interests for obvious reasons. And similarly, with guises exactly the same. But if you hang out with your married friends, then it's an entirely different thing because they know other people and people know people, and you have an opportunity to talk to somebody on the phone before you actually meet them. And so a spiritual and intellectual connection can be made before the eyes play a role. There's a very important point, I want to make sure as we begin to come in for a landing, and that is that men are much more visually driven than women are, which is one of the reasons that men provide overwhelmingly a greater part of the market of the audience for pornography, which is primarily visual than women do, to the extent that women find themselves drawn to if you like, pornography, it's usually not visual. It's it might be a Harlequin romance novel, with incredibly graphic sections, but it's all in words. It's not in pictures. Women are less drawn to pictures than men are. And so it's something that is worthwhile understanding. And that is that most men have a sort of visual picture in their minds of the ideal woman, the one they want to marry the one they want to be with forever. And the fact that she doesn't exist, the fact that she is a fantasy composite is neither here nor there. And this is one of the reasons that it makes much more sense for you to If you're a man or woman, if you're a woman much more sense to the best ability, I mean, a guy will try and resist it. But if you can have substantial conversation time on the telephone, not on Zoom, where there's a visual impact, because I'll tell you this, I'm sure you are a beautiful newbuild gorgeous woman.
Daniel Lapin 55:22
But you're not the one he imagines. And that's already a handicap. And so, to whatever extent you can arrange to talk on the phone before you actually see one another, that is very advantageous. And I'll tell you why it is because we men very easily adjust and shift our model of female power cruddud, depending on circumstances and availability, and, and connection in other ways. And so, very often, you will find guys deliriously happy married to a woman who could hardly look more different from the woman they always describe to their friends as the woman they want to marry. And they don't even remember. And I'm, I'm speaking as a man, this is how we are. And so there is a lot to be said to postponing the visual and focusing on the aural focusing on the ear or the word by the way, just to clarify if there's anybody out there who thinks that there's some confusion because I said, Women like to read, you know, women who are drawn to racy circumstances will read about them much more than they will watch them. And you might say, well, they're using the eyes as well. And the answer, of course, is no. Although your eyes are active in the reading process, that is very minor and superficial part of the gaining of data. The process is actually all you're doing is looking at abstract squiggles that are letters and words. But the actual transformation of that into a reality that is happening in the airport in the intellectual part of the mind. This is one of the reasons that watching images watching movies, let alone pornography, but watching pictures or video of any kind makes you dumber, whereas reading books makes you wiser and smarter. That of course, should not be news to anybody. And if it is, you really need to make sure you understand that and that you believe it in your heart that you know that what I just said there is 100% true. Okay, that's about as far as we go today. I hope this was useful. Make sure you visit the website Rabbi Daniel lapin.com. Take a look at the Bible. Make sure you join the happy warriors community. And take a look also at scrolling through Scripture. If you are interested in the idea of visualizing Scripture as far more than an anachronistic set of legends and stories. Then again, go to Rabbi Daniel lapin.com and take a look at scrolling through Scripture. It will blow your mind. And so thanks for being part of the rabbi Daniel Lapin show. Thank you for subscribing and thank you for spreading the good word until we are together next week. I am your rabbi Rabbi Daniel Lapin. God bless you.
